An Artist With A Purpose???

I am an artist but…

I think nothing can be  more heart wrenching to an artist than having this gift, whether it be sculpting, drawing, painting, whatever, and it never gets shared. People aren’t buying it for whatever reason.  You know deep in your heart you’ve been given this gift and you might not know why, but it comes to you like magic.  An idea just pops into your mind and comes out in forms on paper, in clay, on canvas… you can’t stop…not until it’s finished.  Then it’s done and  you step back to look at it.  You sometimes can’t even fathom that this idea, this piece was created by you…and that’s the beauty. You somehow feel like the messenger.  Then it starts all over.  The next piece. Always the next piece.  You can not stop.  It’s like an addiction.  This piece will be better than the last..and it usually is. Over and over.

But here is the sad part.  you look at the pieces and they don’t mean much after all if they are not admired or shared in some way. To help or to mend someone…something.  To make a statement…to share a feeling…to make someone say “yes, I understand that”…”I have felt the same way”.

The piece just sits there on a shelf, in a drawer or a file.  Where does it go from here?

I have tried so many ways to sell my work on cards, posters, stickers,  sending to licensing companies, selling online, to no avail. You may sell a little here and a little there.  But soon you start asking, “What’s wrong?”  Why did you give me this gift if it just sits there collecting dust.  Do I start over?  Do I try something totally different?  I can’t move.  I don’t know what to do next”.  I want to give up, but the ache is still there.

Am I alone???  Does anyone understand???

Then one day, you see in a magazine or online somewhere, that an artist who just scribbles lines on a paper has made it big.  The designs are everywhere…on cards, in shops, made into figurines, whatever, and you just want to cry. I literally sat the other day, my artwork sprawled out in front of me on the floor, and angrily asked into the empty air…”If you gave this  gift to me, tell me what to do!  What does this all mean???”

I am not a business person, I haven’t got an agent.  I don’t know influential people.  I am an artist.  An artist without a destination- like I’m wandering  in the mist.  That’s what it feels like.  I just want to give my work a place…a place to grow, to be shared, enjoyed…so that maybe… I can say that I have  finally given it  a life now.  I can finally be at peace.  There is a purpose to it all.  It  would finally makes sense.

That… would be sheer heaven.

A card design out in the market today (unbelievable)



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